Sunday, October 28, 2012

It is a Matter of Attitude

I thought I would write about being kind to yourself.

We have had a rough few weeks.  As you know, I was sick.  It lasted two weeks.  Really, two weeks. It seemed endless.

I will admit that I was sick enough that I did not care what I ate.  Or drank.  Yes, I went back to my old ways and drank Coke.  I was so thirsty and somehow got really sick of water and light tea with lemonade that I sunk back into my old ways.  At first, I wasn't eating much so that wasn't a problem but as I felt better, I ate more.

Next confession, I didn't exercise for the two weeks.  Now that I have been better for a week, I have not exercised much this week either.

This has left me in a place where I feel sluggish, sore, and dying for a Coke.  Great - just the inspiration everyone needs.  As I was starting to feel better, I had to take a trip.  When I got back, Silent Sam left on a trip. Without him here, I made poor food choices.  It is so bad that I am happy to cook this week because I am sick of ordering out food.  You know it is bad when...

So, I could really be sad that I have been so awful and tell myself what a jerk I am. "How stupid can you be for falling so far off the path?"  That voice in my head could really go to town on me.  Every negative thought could be right there on an endless reel.

But I am not going to do that. I was sick and blew it. I lost three weeks.  I can start over tomorrow and know that I am back on track.  I was human. I made a few mistakes and I will get over them.  If I beat myself up, I will just perpetuate the problem be feeling lousy about myself.

Instead, I think I will celebrate my humanity.  To err is human and to forgive divine.  I think I will be divine.  Besides, if I am that hard on myself, who will be nice to me?

As a bigger note - by looking at how I treated myself while I was sick (breaking every rule possible) I now know that it is really important to get prepared for sickness.  To take the time to know what we are going to do if Silent Sam gets sick.  I can see where being prepared would make a huge difference for him.

Oh, and Silent Sam hasn't even had a sniffle.  I am so glad that I didn't make him sick.  It wasn't much fun and we weren't ready for him to get sick.
Forgiveness - a gift I give to myself

Thanks for reading!